Do you have a friend that is in an abusive relationship, and you want to talk to them about it? Instead of seeming like you’re attacking them or jumping to conclusions, you wonder how you can talk to them without upsetting them or risk losing them.
Seeing your friend being mistreated can be hurtful but there are signs that you can look for that will show you that your friend is in a bad relationship.
- Stop Having Fun
If your friend stops having fun or doing things that they love, this is a big sign that they could be in an abusive relationship. They might have used to volunteer at the food bank or loved to do art and out of nowhere they gave it up. This could be a sign of manipulation at home.
- Checking In Constantly
When you’re with your friend and she is constantly checking in with her partner and seems panicked when she doesn’t, it can be a situation that is abusive at home. It won’t be a regular checking in just to say hi, but it will be much more.
- Low Self-Esteem
If you see that your friend is no longer strong and has low self-esteem, this can be to the fact that she is dealing with abuse at home.
- Tell Them You Care
Let your partner know that you care about them. Use “I” statements when you talk to them. Start by saying, “You know how much I love and care for you.” Then tell them that you’re worried for them.
- Give Them Time to Respond
Your friend will either deny the relationship or they will tell you the truth. Give them time to tell you what they are thinking and let them express their thoughts. You can recommend things if they tell you that they are being abused.
- Be a Safe Place
Make sure that you’re a safe place for your friend to talk to you. It can be good to have someone to speak with that won’t judge you when you’re dealing with an abusive relationship. You need to be someone that is there for them to be able to open up to.
- Suggest Help
If your friend doesn’t want to tell you what’s going on, talk to them about going to a therapist. Let them know how great of an experience you had when you went to one. Talk to them about getting the help and support that they need and be there as a support system no matter what.
- Affirm Them
People that are being abused emotionally will not be able to have good self-esteem. They will no longer enjoy themselves. Support them and tell them that you know that things aren’t good and that you are there to help them and to support them.
- Keep Recommending Help
Keep recommending help to your friend. Abusive relationships can be scary, and the person might be afraid to leave their partner. They are likely being manipulated and maybe even physically abused. Suggest that your partner gets help or legal support if needed. This could maybe save her life.
