A new relationship leaves us all guilty of losing ourselves a bit. This is normal as you get to know someone, but at some point, there may be a problem. It is fine to dedicate all your spare time to a new relationship, but once the novelty wears off, yet you stay totally devoted to an all-consuming relationship, it can be a problem. This can change your life in drastic ways. This can leave you not knowing where one person ends and the other begins.
This can be an unhealthy meshing together in which you start spending less or no time with family and friends and they start seeing a change. You may become reclusive as a result, preferring alone time in misery than spending time with anyone but your partner. Too often, the relationship will have run its course before we realize how much of ourselves are lost.
Reconnecting with self can be a struggle, but if it keeps us from making the same mistakes in a new relationship, it is worth it. The following is a list of what may be lost. This is important so you are aware of what is at stake and so you can be aware of staying true to your identity.
Keep Your Routine
Be aware of where he ends and you begin and continue to enjoy little things that make you happy outside the relationship. The activities and rituals you kept prior to getting together, should be maintained while together.
Set and keep in mind your future goals. Boyfriends come and go, but your goals are yours to keep. Your goals should remain priority in life and a partner should support them. Never let your boyfriend take away your goals.
It is important that your family and friends get along with your partner, but spend time with them alone as well. A little time apart from your partner is a good thing. Your family and friends are use to having you to themselves, take time to continue this bond.
Never give up on girls’ night. Friends will be around whether the relationship is or not. Treat them with respect and spend time with them on your own when possible.
Most importantly, keep in mind you are your own person with or without your partner. You do not need someone to complete you or control you. Maintain your freedom. You are worth being your own person. Remember all of this to find yourself once lost in a relationship.